He woke up at [[6:00am again]]. I didn't want to wake up at this time but I kept reminding myself that I might only have a few years, few months, or a few days left with him. I have to take advanatage.
I saw him sitting on the backyard porch again in his rocking chair, watching the birds. He always wakes up around this time. I don't know why. It must be an old person thing. I was wondering if, maybe this time, I [[should ask him]]why he wakes up so early or just [[leave it be]] When I went to his porch, i asked him, "Grandad, why do you keep waking up at this hour? Why not sleep?
I thought to myself that maybe it's too [[early for him]] to answer me properly or [[maybe it's not]]. Either way, I wanted to know ...whether I found out now or later.
Sometimes I don't like to ask too many questions. He's answered enough questions in his life.
I went up to him, sat in the rocking chair next to him and said "Good Morning Grandad", he responded, "Good morning, nice to see you again".
I notice he had [[toast on his plate]]. He was sipping on coffee and eating his breakfast. He clearly didn't hear me because he was so focused on his toast.
He looked at me after eating a few more bites and asked me, "Are you hungry?"
I thought about it for a few moments. It was 6 in the morning and I have been waking up every morning to see him. My stomach is always hungry. Sometimes I just want to see him, I I could have said
[["Yes, I am"]] or [["No, not really"]]
He responded to my question and stated,
" You young folk consider anything before the afternoon as "early". Look at the birds, the green grass, the trees and the sunrise. This is not early, this is the start of the day. Early is midnight.
I didn't question anything he said anymore.
He looked at his breakfast of coffee and toast then he looked at me. He asked me " [[do you want to learn how to make toast]He looked at his breakfast, the [[toaast on his plate]] then he looked at me and said
" Do you want to learn how to make toast?"
I wasn't sure whether to laugh, be offended or surprised. I know how to make toast perfectly fine and well. But I kept reminding myself that today could be my last day with him, I'll never know.
I thought some more about his question [[do you want to learn how to make toast]]
Maybe I don't want to since I already know how to. His eyebrows raised in question as if it was silly of me not to be hungry at this hour.
He looked at me and said [[do you want to learn how to make toast]]? He looked at me and asked,
[[do you want to learn how to make toast]] I responded to him and said, " Yes, Grandad I would love to learn how to make toast. How do you make it.
I assumed he was either [[going to get up]] or [[tell me how to make it]]He got up and brought me to the kitchen. I've made toasts so many times in my life. I hardly ever do it anymore. But I guess... anything to spend time with him.
He opened up the pantry closet and I couldn't help but notice [[how much bread there was]]. I also noticed he had jars of what looked like [[peanut butter]] sauce stored up. He began to speak,
"There's more to toast than eating mere bread
When I was a child, all we had was bread slices and some butter if we were lucky. It wasn't often we had these things though.
I have all sorts of bread in the pantry now. White bread, Wheat Bread, Sourdough, Brioche, Banana Bread, and more. I am very grateful for all of the bread I have in my pantry.
Then he noticed the jar of [[peanut butter]] next to him on the coffee table and began to get up and lead me into the kitchen There was brioche, pita, white, wheat, Soda bread, Rye bread, Multigrain, potato bread and more. All of these breads but why? Why am I in my grandfather's house taking a tour of bread?
I also looked inside the pantry and saw tons and tons of jars of what looked like peanut butter but I couldn't tell so,
I asked him,
I[["Is it peanut butter?"]] Grandad told me to grab a plate, a knife, and sit down.
He asked me,
"Pick a bread", so I picked white bread out from the pantry. He then grabed a jar of what looked like peanut butter and asked me "Do you know what this is?"
I was deciding whether I should tell him,
[["Is it peanut butter?"]] or [[I don't know really]]He strangely looked at me and said
"Not at all. When your grandmother was still alive, she made the best hazelnutt butter. When we first got married, she would make toast for me with this hazelnutt butter spread every morning for breakfast.
She even made it for your mother when she was little. She probably would say she refused to remember.
I never knew this about my grandmother. I barely have any memories of her and I certainly don't remember a hazelnutt butter spread.
I was debating asking him
[["Do you put this on your toast every morning" ]]? or wanting to know a little more about my grandmother, I asked him to [[tell me more about this spread]] "This is your grandmother's famous hazelnut butter spread. I put it on my toast all the time. . This isn't a spread you can buy in a store. I've kept her recipie all of these years and i make one jar once a month.
You kids don't really do much of these sort of things anymore. You don't take the time to treasure things, like I did your grandmother's hazelnut butter spread. Making toast means nothing without this butter.
All of the sudden, I felt like after all these days sitting on my grandfather's porch these early mornings, I've never known this about him nor my grandmother. Things we were weridly starting to make sense.
I was debating asking him,
[[tell me more about this spread]] or [["Do you put this on your toast every morning" ]]